Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
I have the apple, I have the white slacks, I have Perrier water. The final piece to this sexual puzzle is finding this little scorcher of a song. The voyage begins today because the year 2010 is the year Vanity and TNUC roam free through the land (accompanied by saxophones).
Mark my words, if the track is found I will perform a private indoor trampoline jumping lesson for your very eyes, oh wait...Stamos beat me to it!
Monday, May 17, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Saturday May 15 @ 10:45 - E.T. RIP-OFFS NIGHT
(feat Mac and Me)
Every major hit spawns a wave of rip-offs, so it was a natural that record-setting box office smash E.T. would spawn a universe of mewling extra-terrestrial offspring. It's a testimony to the original's delicate alchemy (how difficult it was to create a truly adorable alien) that the batallion of E.T. ripoffs is populated with a freakshow of failed cloning mutations that would terrify Dr. Moreau. Well, the tent is open! Come on by and gaze upon a video mix of the saddest group of (un)lovable friends from the sky, each more wrong-headed and misshapen than the last.
Then we watch the Big Kahuna of E.T.'s dark doppelgangers, Mac And Me. Like rat poison or Clorox bleach, this film should be put on a high shelf, well out of childrens' reach. It's sleazily cheap, riotously inept and creatively bankrupt -- it's not even harmless! Some films have product placements, but this movie is a fucking feature-length commercial for McDonald's; with a trailer introduced by Ronald McDonald (watch above), you can bet the film's quasi-lovable alien wasn't the only "Mac" the producers wanted kids to fall in love with. And Mac and Me doesn't just limit its life lessons to the joys of breakdancing in a franchise burger joint, for it also details the life-giving nutritional properties of Skittles and Coca-Cola. We're lovin' it!
Mac and Me // Dir. Stewart Raffill // 1988 // 35mm // 95 min.
611 N. Fairfax Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90036
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Today, TNUC disciples and followers of the good book can rejoice and be glad because this blog turns one years old! This is actually a one year anniversary that celebrates an over 25-year struggle that TNUC fought to get to the top. To clear up any confusion, if you weren't already aware, TNUC was actually the #1 blog in 1985, but sadly excess got the best of TNUC, and the hard-living, fast cars/fast women lifestyle soon turned to overdoses, rehab, divorce hearings, car crashes, and Quaaludes which put TNUC on hold throughout the 90's. It wasn't until one year ago today that TNUC rose from the gutter to kickstart this labyrinth.
As you will see in the latter part of the video, Paulie has since transformed this harmless robotic friend into some sort of electronic sex doll. Evidence of the perverted alcoholic taking advantage of this unique gift is when he refers to the robot as "his girl". Also notice the uncomfortable expression by Apollo Creed.
Vince DiCola - Happy Birthday TNUC (Paulie) by TNUC
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
There's no doubting it, Michael Douglas brings a certain ambiance to his movies that I must thank the Valerie Collective for reminding me about. It just so happens that in the past three years, the great Valerie project College has channeled this distinct atmosphere we speak of into three very special mixes. Here's what he had to say..."Michael Douglas gives off a certain charisma in his films that has inspired me to make a little mix for August. I think we can call this the 'Douglas Touch". After taking pleasure in these mixes, be sure to follow up by re-discovering Michael's filmography with classics not mentioned like Wall Street, Black Rain and Falling Down, where you will bare witness to new dimensions of stress. Enjoy.